Ladies Mailbag: gift giving edition

Published on: February 07, 2013 | Written by: Lori Kelly

John M asks, What's the cutoff for grown men and body paint at sporting events? Shouldn't that be over 20? 

The cutoff is 22. So no post college-aged guys. That includes you, 7th-year senior. 25 and still in college? Good for you! You're special. But you can no longer wear body paint.  

This is a good rule of thumb for jerseys as well. Ask yourself, am I in college and under the age of 22? Yup! Can't wait to put on my Brittney Griner jersey! Hope she dunks! (We are all about equality at OKTC)
 
There is one exception, and that is the World Cup, where you are obligated to paint the American flag on your body and act like a hooligan. Then it's patriotism. 
 
@ItsMsJisner asks, John or Jim?
 
Welcome to my Super Bowl Sunday! 
 
My initial response was Jim. You have to go with the quarterback, right? Being a defensive back at Miami of Ohio is not as impressive as being a quarterback in the NFL for 13 years. He's also taller. 
 
But John is better looking, and I suspect he's smarter and more fun. That trumps tall and athletic every time. 
 
@YOUNG_WROBERT asks, Why is public intoxication such a big deal in Knoxville? 
 
If there's a story behind this worth telling, submit it here.
 
UT campus police are notoriously petulant. I can give multiple examples. Like my friend who had all the alcohol in his cooler poured out on game day while three other officers laughed. He was even wearing construction cone orange! Or the time I got detained for trespassing on the field at a deserted Neyland Stadium. I tried explaining to the cop that my friend was a Gator fan and I wanted to show him what a real stadium looked like. Zero response. Nothing. I am supposedly banned from campus to this very day. 
 
It could also have something to do with this. Which is likely the reason UTK officials didn't think the buttchugging incident was hilarious. Because it's still sodomy, even with a plastic tube of boxed wine. (Clay, I think we found a new slogan!)
 
Craig H asks, I plan to make my first SEC road trip this year. I know Clay recommends LSU as best spot. But if I have to bring my wife and 12 year old daughter, is there a better venue that they will enjoy- sightseeing, shopping, etc? 
 
What do 12 year old girls do? When I was 12, I liked to play softball, read and watch country music videos. Somehow I am not a lesbian. But kids are more advanced now so she probably likes what I did when I was 14, which was drink Zimas with my friends and not hang out with my parents. What a fun trip! 
 
I would go with Oxford or Athens. They're both quaint, scenic towns with plenty of shopping and restaurants plus the SEC tailgating scene Dad wants. Don't forget to write about it!
 
Paul M asks, I was wondering what is the proper protocol for returning gifts between spouses. Last year I bought my wife a nice watch for her birthday, she didn't like it and took it back and got another watch she liked better. For Christmas I bought her a Coach purse and a wallet. She didn't like that either and returned them and bought a different purse she liked more. She said she liked both gifts and appreciated the thought but she didn't want to spend that much money on something she didn't love. Should I be offended? Should I just hand over cash this year? Should I continue to try and surprise her with other gifts?
 
Because you said she liked and appreciated your gifts, I'm assuming she wasn't mean and ungrateful. If she was, you know what to do. I went to divorce court yesterday with a friend. It wasn't so bad. 
 
This is a contentious debate amongst my friends. Two of them said it's the thought that counts, and they would keep it because their husbands picked it out and put thought into it. Saps! Fools! They're doomed to a life of material possessions they don't even like so as not to hurt a man's feelings. Is that really what you want your wife to do? Don't you get more joy knowing she got something she truly likes? 
 
Regardless, you aren't totally missing the mark. You bought her a watch and she exchanged it for a watch, instead of, like, a vibrator. Or a handgun. Then you could be concerned. 
 
So yes, keep trying to pick out thoughtful gifts for your wife. What you should not do is give her cash. You're married! Your money is her money. That's like saying, hey babe, I got you a car, Merry Christmas!, but it's really just your 2003 Toyota Camry that she gets to drive all the time now. 
 
 
 
Have questions for the ladies of OKTC? Tweet them to Hayley @hayleyfrizank or me @lorioktc