by By Gordon Monson Tribune Columnist , The Salt Lake Tribune

Let's start over.

Looking back, it was a bad idea for me to announce in December, when I wasn't even playing because a bad left wheel benched me for what turned out to be most of the season, that I was going to opt out and, to quote myself, "no matter what, I'm going to get a raise, regardless."

Sometimes your words come back to haunt you.

They sounded pretty dumb then, and they sound especially dumb now. Dumb. Dumber. Dumbest.

I know, I know, after Larry Miller heard my remarks, he called what I said and when I said it, "one of the 10 stupidest things I've ever heard an NBA player do in 24 years."

He was right. Even my man D-Will said my comments were "a little odd."

But it was what I was feeling at the time, what I was feeling right up until Tuesday, when it finally crashed in on me that nobody in the league wanted to pay me what I thought I was worth: $15 million a year.

It hurts, man. That kind of cake was nowhere in sight.

So I'll settle now for a measly $12.7 for one last season in Utah.

If I'd only known.

I guess my past caught up with me. Messing over the Cavs the way I did, chasing the money, always the money, and then missing a third of my games over the past five years with the Jazz . I didn't think that was any sort of big deal, but ... apparently, it was. Who knew?

Well. I can change.

No, no, really. Don't boo me, just boooooooozer me.

I can stop thinking about myself and start thinking about the team. I might even, on good nights, play short stretches of defense. Or get Mehmet to play more. One of us has to stop somebody sometime. I vote for him.

I know by opting in that I've made pig slop out of the Jazz's salary situation. I'm blasting the smithereens out of the cap. Not only are the Jazz going to have to give luxury tax money over to the league, if they re-sign Paul Millsap, which they've said all along they want to do, they could blast toward $30 million in increased salary and luxury money.

On the other hand, now they might lose Paul.

Collateral damage.

It's all right. Maybe they can get their money back by raising ticket prices. We all have to do our part here. It's a team effort. Sure, that financial burden crushes a small-market franchise, but it helps me, it saves me from opting out and taking a large pay cut. I'm trying to be selfless here, but, hey, I can't get there all in one swoop. We can get through this together.

We can talk as though we're going to win a championship, you all can buy the tickets and get your hopes up, I can be real careful this time not to get hurt for longer than a month by never overextending myself, I'll get my nightly 20-and-10 when I'm playing, we'll lose early in the playoffs, and then, as a full-fledged free agent, I'll take the next flight out of town and dupe another team.

I can change like that.

I've learned my lessons.

I'm a team guy now, a humbled star, a new man.

Hypothetically speaking.

Best,

Your power forward (for one more year, unless the Jazz trade my butt)

GORDON MONSON hosts "The Monson and Graham Show" weekdays from 2-6 p.m. on 1280 AM The Zone. He can be reached at gmonson@sltrib.com . Alt Heads:

A change, in theory, would do me good

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