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Week 7 preview: Time for Favre, Vikings to fall

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Kevin Hench

An accomplished film and television writer, Kevin Hench's latest screenwriting credit is for The Hammer, which stars Adam Carolla. His podcast, Spider and the Henchman, is available every Friday on iTunes. MORE>>
Updated Oct 23, 2009 7:36 PM ET
     
 
He's too old. His arm problems have reduced him to a dink-and-dunker. He's a selfish, schism-inducing team-wrecker. Ah, August. It seems like a long time ago.
Since then, all Brett Favre has done is prove 40 is the new 30, throw lasers all over the field and unite the Vikings by making them a leading Super Bowl contender. But one thing the Ol' Gunslinger will not do this season is run the table. Yes, this is what Favre's exploits have reduced us to — proclaiming he will not go 16-0. (Take that, old man!) The first loss will arrive this Sunday courtesy the defending champion Steelers. Pittsburgh is averaging 404 yards of offense per game and allowing 275 on defense, a difference of 129 yards per game. The Vikings, meanwhile, are averaging 348 on offense while allowing 342 on D, a paltry six-yard difference. This is why some observers think their 6-0 mark has a little smoke-and-mirrors to it. If not for the Favre-to-Lewis Play of the Year and a missed field goal by the Ravens, the Vikings could easily be the 4-2 team entering this game. And if not for two missed field goals by party animal Jeff Reed against the Bears and two late fourth-down conversions by the Bengals, the Steelers could easily be the undefeated team in this game. Things will start to balance out on Sunday. He may not be Adrian Peterson, but Rashard Mendenhall has given the Black and Gold a huge lift, averaging over five yards a carry after supplanting Willie Parker as the starter. Hines Ward leads the NFL in receptions and amazingly — for someone considered a possession receiver — in receiving yards. And it's worth remembering that 27-year-old Ben Roethlisberger, who is completing a staggering 72.5 percent of his passes, has won twice as many Super Bowl rings as the 40-year-old Favre. There's no ring on the line, but in this rematch of Super Bowl IX and possible preview of XLIV, Big Ben will prevail.

Distraction of the Week

Peyton Manning introduced the phrase "idiot kicker gets liquored up" in reference to Mike Vanderjagt. But it looks like Jeff Reed is determined to make the phrase his own. For the second time in less than a year, Reed has run into trouble with the law after apparently being overserved. He provided the obligatory semi-apology, but if beating the Browns is cause enough to get so lit you'd get in a confrontation with the police, imagine how loaded he might get when the Steelers beat the Vikings on Sunday.

Week 7 Search for Respect

The Chargers travel to K.C. this week in an attempt to rediscover any remnants of the manhood the Broncos trampled last Monday. Not only did Denver brazenly impose on the Chargers' pregame warmups, the Broncos then proceeded to pound San Diego in all three phases in a 34-23 road victory. Shawne Merriman acted as peacemaker in the pregame contretemps, later saying, "If I have something to say to you, I've got 60 minutes to say it on the field." Here are some of the things Merriman said in his latest zero-sack conversation with an offense. "Hey, nice blocking." "Wow, we can't get off the field on third down." "Does Elvis Dumervil really have 10 sacks while I'm stuck on zero?"

Worst Week of Sleep Leading up to Kickoff

Even though Mark Sanchez has gone from "the next Joe Namath" to "the next Browning Nagle" in New York in the span of three weeks, no one has had a worse week of sleep leading up to kickoff than tight end Ben Hartsock. It was Hartsock's holding penalty that cost the Jets a chip shot field goal attempt and ultimately led to their OT loss to the Bills. Had Hartsock not been flagged and the Jets pulled out an ugly victory, Sanchez might have gotten a pass for his Meadowlands disaster. But now as the Jets travel to Oakland, the scary words "Kellen Clemens" are starting to be whispered. Honorable mention: James Ihedigbo and Marques Murrell. In an overtime battle where field position was everything, these two knuckleheads decided it would be a good idea to just start throwing punches at the head of Bills special-teamer Derek Fine on a kick return, burying the Jets deep in their own territory. Jets coach Rex Ryan has acknowledged their stupidity by making them inactive for Week 7.

Hottest Hot Seat

With Jim Zorn merely waiting to be terminated in D.C. he's not really on the hot seat anymore. It's just a matter of when Daniel Snyder throws the switch on Ol' Sparky. So who is now wearing the pink (slip) jersey as the hot seat leader? Believe it or not, it's Jeff Fisher. He is without question one of the elite coaches in the NFL, but his team has not showed up prepared to play in any of its last three games, a stretch during which the Titans were outscored 127-26. And now, Titans 85-year-old owner Bud Adams has weighed in with his disappointment, lest anyone think Fisher has permanent tenure in Tennessee. Enjoy your bye week, Coach.

Injury Roulette Wheel of the Week

Round and round the wheel goes, where it stops nobody knows. Except the Bears. They pretty much know it's going to stop in their linebacking corps. First Brian Urlacher was lost for the season with a wrist injury in Week 1. Then his replacement Hunter Hillenmeyer went down with a rib injury in Week 3 and just returned to practice this week. Now comes news that outside linebacker Pisa Tinoisamoa is out for the season with a knee injury. Poor Lance Briggs must be walking on eggshells.

Raider Melodrama of the Week

Whoa, easy fella. Buoyed by his team's one-game winning streak, Pro Bowl defensive end Richard Seymour took a shot at Giants linebacker Antonio Pierce — who had likened pounding the Raiders to playing in a scrimmage. "They got what they deserved this week," said Seymour, pointing to the Saints' rout of the G-Men. "I'm not sure how many points the Saints scored on them, but if I'm not mistaken, it was half a hundred points. So, I think he got enough to chew on himself with that." Seymour also announced that the Raiders would make the playoffs. The Raiders are 2-4, four games behind the Broncos. That other looming Raider melodrama appears to be going away, as the Napa County District Attorney has decided not to press assault charges against coach Tom Cable. Now Cable can turn his full attention to preparing his team for its playoff run.

Fantasy Headache of the Week

Will the real Matt Forte please stand up? And score a freakin' touchdown. And stop fumbling at the 1.

Fantasy impact

Fantasy football Feel the need to update your fantasy football team as a result of this? Get the lowdown from FOXSports.com's experts HERE.
Mercy. The guy has had one good game this season. Subtract his 12-carry, 121-yard day against the lowly Lions and he has gained 173 yards on 74 carries, a ghastly 2.3 yards per carry average. As the Bears travel to Cincinnati is there any Forte owner who wouldn't trade him straight up for Cedric Benson? Forte's average draft position was 7.3. Benson's 74.7.

L.A. Awaits, Franchise Relocation Watch

Listening to L.A. sports talk radio this week, the Southland is abuzz with debate about which team we want to come play in the new stadium to be built 15 miles east of the city. Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger signed an environmental exemption bill for the stadium this week, which means no franchise should be considered too toxic to play there. How many Mayflower moving vans would it take to move a team from, say, St. Louis?
Tagged: Brett Favre, Jeff Reed, Antonio Pierce, Elvis Dumervil, Derek Fine, Bears, Bills, Bengals, Mike Vanderjagt, Marques Murrell, Browns, Cedric Benson, Broncos, Lions, Titans, Raiders, Vikings, Saints, Giants, James Ihedigbo, Matt Forte, Jets, Mark Sanchez, Brian Urlacher, Pisa Tinoisamoa, Richard Seymour, Steelers, Chargers, Lance Briggs, Hunter Hillenmeyer, Hines Ward, Adrian Peterson, Willie Parker, Rashard Mendenhall, Ben Roethlisberger

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